Once upon a time, there lived a young munchkin named Psyduck. Psyduck lived an ordinary life until the day of her English exam, on which she fell into a duck hole on her way to school.

Screaming as she tumbled endlessly, she ultimately landed gracefully on something... soft. It was rather anticlimatic, to say the least, but she felt so terribly lucky that she simply sat there, stunned.

"Mmmphmmph!"

Psyduck blinked. "Mmmphmmph?" she wondered aloud.

"Mmmphmmph!" And Psyduck yelped as she was tipped off her perch, landing sprawled on her back. "I would appreciate it if you didn't poke fun at my chubbiness by falling on me! Honestly - public school kids these days!"

Psyduck stared at the round little thing as it shook itself off. "I'm sorry?"

"I prefer The Great Empress Munchlax, if you will," the indignant creature huffed. She puffed up in self importance. "Well, painfully dynamic entrance aside... welcome to the Hate School Club!"

"Hate School Club?" Psyduck repeated blankly. "But I just fell."

Munchlax nodded wisely. "On your way to school, right? Let me guess, you are haunted by some sort of assessment."

Psyduck jumped to her feet, suddenly frantic. "My English exam! I'm going to be late! Quick Munchlax - where's the way out?"

"Way out? My dear child, if you stay here you will be safe from the evil reaches of schoolwork."

"But I don't belong here!"

"So confident about her identity," Munchlax sighed. "Are you sure you don't want to change?" Apparently not. "Very well. I'll tell you. To leave the Hate School Club, all you have to do is prove that you love school."

Psyduck digested this. "But... I hate school."

Munchlax clapped her hands. "Then you belong here!"

"No, no, I have to do my English exam," Psyduck said quickly.

"... Do you really hate school?" Munchlax asked dubiously.

"Of course I do!"

"Really? Hmm... nine plus sixteen!"

"Twenty five!" Psyduck squeaked immediately.

Munchlax stroked her nonexistent beard. "Well, whether you love or hate school, you're certainly good at it."

"I hate school," Psyduck said. "Trust me."

"But then you can't leave the Hate School Club and do your English exam."

That was true. Psyduck began to panic. Munchlax took pity on the poor child and snapped her fingers. "Never fear! I know exactly how to reveal your true self."

And that was how Psyduck met boredofstudies.com. It grinned at her. "If you sell your soul to me, I will provide you with free notes and resources to help you ace your exams."

Psyduck gaped. "Such a thing exists?!"

"Why yes," boredofstudies.com said. "All you have to do is click on me. An instant A+ for that pesky English exam of yours."

"But that's cheating," Psyduck realised. "I can't cheat."

"If you hate school, you will not worry about cheating."

"Well, I do hate school but I don't want to cheat."

"Child, that is as paradoxical as a simple complex number."

"Oh, complex numbers? They're actually quite simple-"

boredofstudies.com groaned in exasperation. "I give up. This munchkin is impossible. Munchlax, make her leave! She loves school. It's poisoning our air."

"No, really, I hate school," Psyduck insisted.

Munchlax fail-whistled and took out a row of stickers. "Back to your beloved English exam, kiddo. I'll slap a magical sticker on you and you'll be flying out of here in no time. Of course, you'll owe me ice cream."

"I'll treat you to a lifetime of ice cream," Psyduck promised.

"Good girl. Now, what kind of sticker shall I give you... aha! I'll give you a sun!"

Psyduck spun around in confusion.


Munchlax's uncontrollable laughter followed her up the tunnel, echoing in her head even after she was spat out of the duck hole. Still confused, Psyduck the innocent munchkin continued on her way to school, aced her exams and graduated with a Bachelor of Supremely Economical Mathematics, majoring in Love/Hate Relationship. Psyduck became a rich munchkin and lived happily ever after.

Oh, and she joyfully showered Munchlax with buckets of ice cream.

The End.